Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Ramblings--from Yesterday

I am floored each and every day at the weather here. This morning, expecting cooler temps for the week (since I missed the balmy 80s last week as we were traveling to MS), I put on a t-shirt and yoga pants and a light pullover—by light I mean, so old and worn that it needs to be retired. I got this pullover which is nothing more than a long sleeved material…no thickness to it…for my high school graduation 12.5 years ago, and I have worn it ever since then! I think it’s the most useful graduation gift anyone ever received.

Out the door Chance and I went at 5:15 to ride the bicycle our 2.5 miles. And wow! It was so warm!! We got to the lake—more like a large pond, but here, for some reason, they refer to it as a lake—and several mallards were roosting in the water’s edge. It was quiet and no one was out, and all I heard was a low chatter of quacks, and Chance’s tags jingling to tell me he was still following me. Absolutely soul inspiring.

Today is my birthday, and even though I am like a little kid on my birthday, somewhat a little more secretly now than years past, I usually am sick or something on my birthday. Today has been awesome…only bad part is I had to work. Aside from that, I couldn’t ask for more, well, I could, but I won’t go there. Many calls from friends. Many wishes on Facebook.

And yes, KCA, I am an old woman! But I actually feel great. I jumped back on the Weightwatchers wagon last night, and this morning DH prodded me for doing so on my birthday and New Year’s. But, I actually think it will force me to practice some restraint this week.

I suddenly am so motivated to do things. My first thing, I am a compulsive list maker, and I carry around a notebook with tons of useless lists and I wanted the Iphone (which I LOVE!!!) so that I’d stop carrying around useless notebooks…so today, I vowed to stop carrying a notebook so that whatever I felt like I had to write down I had to use my Iphone, which I do a lot, but this will force me to make the moistest of the hostess… I am now endeavoring on a huge task to inventory my life on that thing short of security related stuff!!

And then I had a revelation while in the ladies room today, no not doing the doody—if I like these apps so much and I hate being a chemist on days and I love all things green, and I want to do good, why not find a way to mesh life, chemistry, green, and mobile apps and market it…along with organization…I know someone just stole my idea, don’t worry , it’s hard to figure what’s going on in my brain…and if you do, then let me know.

Well, I must go and enjoy my birthday and while I’m at it, I think I’ll learn about some blogging techniques. And dream about starting school in 6 days and try to teach Chance obedience via telepathy and re-landscaping my backyard and download some new apps to help me be connected on the Iphone. The greatest thing since sliced bread!

Happy New Year’s! 2009—the Year of Productivity and Food for the Soul

Monday, December 29, 2008

Days Gone By...and More On the Way

Somehow, it always happens. I anticipate Christmas, and it flies by. I don't do all the things I intended, and I usually come home from Christmas depressed about how much money I don't have, or that I miss my family, or that I gained weight, or that I didn't get this or that, or it's cold, or I intended to do this...I could go on and on. This year, I went home, the first time I'd been home since August, which is quite unusual for me. I had so much fun. I was sick most of the time, which is again unusual, I don't get colds, yes, I had h. pylorii for 2 months, but most people don't get that like they get a runny nose. I don't get runny noses. But the weather change was enough to give me a horrendous sinus headache for the entire time I was home. Nevertheless, my 5 year old niece made me laugh and laugh and laugh, and so did my father-in-law, and my step father-in-law and my aunt and uncle, and I can never go a day without laughing with my dad. And Brian was even at his funniest. I think it was one of the jolliest Christmases I have spent with my family in quite some time...oh, and Jeff was his usual jolly self that I know perhaps better than anyone.

We returned home, and no depression. In fact, aside from being tired, I rather enjoyed the day. Brian and I are getting along great, the dog is piled up on the bed legs sprawled out on his back, soaking up the cool air from the ceiling fan. The day was beautiful, 78 and sunny. Perfect Fl weather and Brian can now park his truck and my 4runner in the garage!!! Still have to work on being able to get the bike out without moving the vehicles out, but I think I see the solution to that, just waiting on our neighbor to get the shelves he claimed.

what I noticed most today was that Chance and I were in the last light of day at 6:13 pm on our evening adventure. Do you know what that means? It means that we are on the downhill to the dog days of summer. Tell me I'm wishing my life away, I know. I just love long days.

I love the idea of starting school next week too. Three days a week. What is even better, 8 weeks of it and then I start new classes. Time to get rolling.

Sunday, December 21, 2008

Digressions over the year

Time flies when you're having fun, but more importantly, time flies when you're not. The first of my year consisted of coping with the loss of my forever dog and companion, Charlie. I was engulfed with grief. In fact, my last two months at Benning were a blur. I came home every day, in tears, took a shot of Bacardi...I do not have a drinking problem, it was one shot, and it almost felt like I had to have it to be able to walk into that house. Moving wasn't much better, we got here and I travelled all the time, and was alone, our house was empty. I was still engulfed with grief.

Then, when I was laid off, I decided to patch the pain and get another dog. My dad found me an appropriate little scrawny puppy. He was lanky and skinny. I had made up my mind that I really didn't think I wanted him, and he'd taken up with my dad and likewise, so I was prepared to not feel bad about leaving him to be my parents pet. Then we went home to visit and I saw him, and still, I didn't feel that immediate attachment, just an obligation to care for him. But he picked me out. Not knowing me and having an affection for my father, he latched on to me and would not let me out of his site. And it's been that way for the past 5 months.

We enjoy our trips to the beach on a regular weekend basis now. The pain of Charlie's death haunts me at least twice a day, and I miss him so much. But a little girl said it best yesterday at the beach...she was about 10 or 11 and she played with all the dogs, which is heaven for most dogs and their owners. She looked at one dog and said to me, you just have to understand them...what they want. All Charlie ever wanted was to be near me and me to be happy. Well, he is very near to me, even in death, and I suppose I am happy. I get to go to the beach every weekend, and it's December. I walked outside while ago and said it was hot and it's the official first day of winter. I miss Charlie, but he lives on in my soul. I remember that he never had a bad walk, all he ever wanted in life was to play and be around those he loved. And that's what I have in life, so I'm happy. Now that I know what it is to be happy again, I realize how much time I lost while I was sad.

I am going to try and savor every day next year. My resolution is to have no resolutions, but to seize each day and not become slave to "the house needs to be cleaned" or "I need to work late" but rather to become slave to taking a breath of fresh air and allowing it to calm me. I vow to "have a good walk" every day, dogs do, so why can't people.

Sunday, December 14, 2008

A Day at the Beach

Living in FL has its drawbacks...the housing market sucks, property taxes are ridiculous, and, well, there's not much more. What is great...it's mid-Dec. Where I am from, people are freezing their buns off and people from up North would scoff at that. I, on the other hand, got up this morning, took Chancey for a bike ride--he ran, I rode--came home, put on shorts and a t-shirt and went into the yard to work...all before 8 am. We then played in the water hose, got ready to go to the beach, and off we went. The day at the beach was wonderful. One of the joys of being a Floridian is that in the winter all the people are gone from the beach, and you can enjoy it without sweating a gallon, and without fighting for your 1 sq. yd. of beach space.

You can only enjoy weather like this in FL in December!! I love it. The highs all week are in the upper 70s and 80, and the lows in the upper 50s. Fabulous. If only I could work from home and get paid for it....a goal to work towards during my MBA pursuit which begins in 21 days.

The doggies have a ball at the beach. Today, I saw Chance play more with dogs than I ever have, and he finally learned to swim way out in the water and not be afraid. I loved it. We both returned home tired pups, and DH cooked us dinner. Grilled beer Italian sausages with sauteed peppers and onions...and he even cleaned up the mess!!!! WOW...I feel like I've died and gone to heaven....not really but close.